Thursday, August 11, 2011


Is it wrong to be overly ambitious, just do whatever you want cos it makes you happy?

That is the question I ask myself each time I think about stuffs that interests me, things that makes me happy when I do them. They give me peace of mind, I feel relaxed when I do them; I can do them free of charge and I can say I do them for leisure. You might see it as awkward and a waste of time.

These jobs so to say, are professional some people do rely solely on it for a living, saying I want to do them for fun might seem like trying to feel a basket with water. Ironically, it’s like filling a basket with a sharp sand; some would spill while filling the basket but it’s never a waste for you can pack the ‘waste’ and put them in the basket still, there sure must be left over no matter how prudent I am. The question is; what happens to those left over? They return to the earth where they come from, they are recycled into something better than sharp sand, I guess.

I love painting (though I have no idea how artists go about), photography, running a grocery store, creating my own fashion signature-everyone does that. I thnk they are all connected to the different states of my mind. I think grocery when I think of what to eat to be healthy ‘in and out’. When I say in and out I mean being inside and glowing outside, with a radiant glowing skin. I think of creating my own fashion signature when I look at myself ‘in and out’ and I see a glowing skin radiating and complementing the rays of the sun-I just want to cover my skin with the best clothes I can make for my self and just for myself-I am not being selfish. A Herculean stand behind the cameras and a nice pose in my comfort zone is all I needed to cool my nerves. Trying a world of making impossible possible, that’s what painting is to me and that’s exactly what focusing the lens means to me. Painting and photography is that dream world that I don’t want to wake up from. Though I might paint after retirement….lolz 0_0

To be continued…………………Season film ni o!!!